Mistakes Were Made

1. Lying down for a fifteen-minute nap at 9:13 PM.

2. Freezing two dozen bananas still in the peels.

3. Losing the DMV renewal stickers for the Civic.

4. Mailing the DMV registration renewal papers late for the Camry.

5. Not confirming breakfast with my friends before showing up early at the restaurant.

6. Throwing away three Christmas card envelopes without getting the addresses off of the return labels.

7. Letting Fella and Filly eat popcorn in the car.

8. Overpromising.

9. Underdelivering. (Separate incidents.)

10. Opening a can of Diet Coke that was partially frozen.

11. Leaving the oven on while we were out at a party.

12. Buying shiny nylons.

13. Running out of sugar.

14. Linking to a Jellyfish video.

15. Losing all my makeup, probably in a gutter in Coronado, when I jumped out of the car to buy birthday candles at the Rite Aid.

16. Eating half a bag of gummy SweeTart pink and green Christmas candies.

17. Skimping on the hairstyle budget for my wedding.

18. Having an abortion.

19. Making an abortion joke. It’s in poor taste.

20. Trying to superglue an ornament back together by myself.

21. Leaving an ornament within a toddler’s reach.

22. Leaving my wedding rings within a toddler’s reach.

23. Purchasing a song through iTunes that we already had but didn’t know what it was actually called until we purchased it.

24. RSVPing the day of a party, with a yes. It’s just rude.

25. Procrastinating.

26. Wearing out the conceit of a blog entry by taking it long past funny.

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